February became March and Jona's parents made the trip back up to Colorado from Arizona. In order to shock the kids into behaving themselves, David and Skyler had Morbus bring in the stun guns and traps that they looked at over Hanukkah. The kids that were at home or lived near home all cringed at the sight of the old coyote traps that their father's legendary former bodyguard brought into the house. Maddie leaned into Jordan and whispered. "They mean business, don't they?"
Jordan swallowed her pulse. "I believe they do. If the stun guns don't get whatever the job is done, then the trap will. Teeth trump voltage, and the two together are unstoppable." She shivered involuntarily.
They watched as their father and Skyler tested the stun guns. They would turn them on and watch them crackle and pop before aiming them. The girls would shiver as they watched their father sight down his arm and squeeze the trigger on the stun gun to release the electrodes. They would land in the cushion of the couch. Thankfully, the couch was an insulator, so no one got a shock.
"Do you really think Dad will use those on us?" Jessi asked when she, Meagan, and Makayla came home from school on Spring break the week of their father's birthday.
Jordan laughed. "Maybe on your retards, but Daddy love me and Maddie too much."
"I wouldn't be so confident", Jake said, having over heard what Jordan said when he walked into the Kitchen to fix his kids some lunch.
"What do you say that, Jake?"
"Because, my darling twin sister, Dad knows that all of you girls and a couple of us boys are rather nosy and can't help but want to feel included. From what I understand, Jona only want Mom, 'Miah, and her mother in the room when she has the baby. I've been asked to be on standby so I'm taking time off work to be here in case I'm needed."
"But that doesn't mean that Dad will use those tasers, does it?" Makayla asked.
"Kay, believe me when I say that I've seen the look in both Dad and Skyler's eyes when they start playing with those tasers. Not only can they, but they will and will have no qualms about it." And with that, Jake went about making his children lunch.
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"So, it's the 39 week check up", Brie said to Jona. "How are you feeling?"
"I'm nervous, excited. I feel enormous", Jona asked.
"Baby, I know the feeling. I'm sure you know why Jake is here, right?"
"Same reason he's been here every month, to be the vampire and take my blood to the lab to make sure that everything is ok", Jona said dully.
Jake chuckled. "Don't sound so excited, Jona."
"Believe me, there's nothing to be excited about other than the fact that I never feel the needle when you stick me."
"Well, at least I don't have to take three vials. It's only one today."
"Can we just get this over with?" she asked.
Jake smiled as he put on a pair of gloves and grabbed the things he would need to make the blood draw. He sat down next to Jona and just started talking to her. Next thing she knew, he was putting the cap on the vial and shaking it up. He looked at his mother. "I'll run this into the lab at the hospital and have it run right away. There aren't a lot of blood draws happening right now that I know of. There shouldn't be any problem getting this run immediately", he said as he pulled his gloves off and put the vial of blood in an insulated envelope.
Brie smiled. "Thank you, son."
He kissed his mother's cheek on the way out the door. "No problem, Mom. I'll be home for dinner."
Brie laughed. "You've never missed, so I'm sure you will be."
"What can I say? You and my wife can cook like there is no tomorrow. So can you and Dad."
"Well, it's a Delilah cooking night tonight. She decided to make chili for dinner tonight."
"Not super spicy, I hope. We don't Jona to go into labor just yet."
"Actually, Dad's hoping it's tonight. You know what tomorrow is."
"Well, if little Mattie doesn't want to be Grampa David's birthday baby, then he's not going to be", Jona said as she got more comfortable on the examination table.
Jake shook his head and laughed as he walked out of the room. "Oh, Lord. I can't wait to tell Dad that one", he said as he shut the door.
Brie grabbed a pair of gloves and went to the table to check Jona. "It seems to me that he's dropping into position quite nicely", Brie said as she performed an abdominal exam. "Have you been experiencing any discomfort?"
"I wouldn't call it discomfort."
"What would you call it?"
"Pain."
"Describe it to me." Brie snapped on the gloves and did a vaginal exam to check the cervix.
"It feels like someone's grabbing a hold of something inside me and pulling. I've come close to doubling over a few times."
"Fun. Braxton- Hicks contractions." She sighed. "Little Mattie may be here by tomorrow."
"What? Why do you say that?" There was a hint of panic in Jona's voice.
"Sweetie, you're dilated to 4. It's only a matter of time until your water breaks. That baby will be here very soon. When did you want to start drinking that raspberry leaf tea you mentioned a little while ago?"
"When would you suggest?"
"Well, you're already dilating, so it wouldn't hurt to start drinking it soon so that we can induce labor. And, if you would like, Maddie or I can work on a couple of acupressure/ Shiatsu points that will help to induce labor."
"Can we do that after dinner?"
"If that's what you want."
Jona sighed. "I really don't know what I want."
Brie smiled. "Then why don't we give you some raspberry tea and you can just relax. We'll just see how everything goes."
---------------
When Jeremiah got home from work that afternoon, he found Jona sitting on the couch sipping on a cup of tea. "Hey beautiful. How are you feeling?" he asked as he set the messenger bag that he put all of his papers on the floor next to his feet when he sat down next to her.
"Your Mom says that I could go into full blown labor at anytime and that I'm dilated to 4. She's having me drink the raspberry leaf tea to kick things off. She offered to work some Shiatsu points to help put me into labor, but I dont' know about all that."
"So you're just going to drink the tea and pray?"
"Something like that. You have tomorrow off right?"
"Tomorrow is Saturday, baby. I'm here all day. There aren't any faculty meetings or anything like that. I have to do Parent- Teacher conferences next week, but I'm here this weekend."
She balled up in pain and her free hand went to her swollen stomach. "Oooh", she said in a pained voice. "This shit sucks!"
Miah took the cup of tea from his wife and set it on the coffee table then took her hand. "Breathe, baby girl. You have to just breathe through it. Remember all of those classes we went to?"
She squeezed his hand and tried to remember how to breathe. After it was over she relaxed and laid back against the back of the couch. "We're not having more after this one for a few years."
Jeremiah smiled. "If that's what you want, baby, then I'm more than happy to oblige. We'll do whatever it takes to keep it from happening until you're ready to have another one."
"I need to go to the bathroom, but I'm almost scared to get up and go to the bathroom because I'm scared my water will break if I move around too much."
"I could carry you to the bathroom if that will make you feel better?"
"I'm humongous and you want to carry me to the bathroom?"
"Baby, you're not that big. Yes, you've put on weight, but that's to be expected. I'm curious as to how much of that is actually baby. You didn't really get all that big, so it's possible that he's going to be small. It's also possible that most of the weight you put on is baby."
"You're not making me feel better, Jeremiah."
He chuckled in embarrassment and hung his head. "What I'm trying to say is that carrying you won't be that big a problem and if your water does break, at least I'm home so that I can be here for you and I don't have to peel out of the parking lot at the school to get here before the baby comes." He stood. "Come on, wrap your arms around my neck", he said and bent down. She did and he scooped her up to carry her to the nearest bathroom.
---------------
Brie and David were finally settled into bed and were watching a movie that he had just purchased that afternoon. It was a movie that they had seen in theaters during one of their trips to Israel and she wanted it in english. Hearing it in Hebrew was fun, but she liked her native tongue just fine. As the movie played, they spoke very little, but they still spoke. "What are you thinking?" David asked about half way through the movie.
"I'm actually thinking about Jona right now. I'm almost certain that after we're asleep, 'Miah's going to come beating on the door saying that she's gone into labor. I'm glad they let me set up everything in their room so that we would be ready just in case."
"You think I'm going to get my birthday baby tomorrow?"
"I'm going to say that it's very likely. She's been drinking the raspberry tea all day since her check up. Jake said that her petosin levels are elevated and that's a sign that she could go into labor at any minute. Miah said she's been having labor pains all day since he got home and they seem to be developing a pattern. When he beats on that door, it will be to tell us that her water's broken and I need to get my ass into their room to check her progress."
"What are my orders?"
"Get Jake in the house as soon as you can and keep everyone away from Jeremiah and Jona's room lest Jona tears their head off after little Matt is born."
"I take it you're going to wake Skyler and Kaylian while I go beat on Jake's door."
"That's the plan."
"Ok. I can do that." They lapsed into silence again and just watched the movie play out. Brie noted that the translation into Hebrew was rather sketchy as they sat and watched the movie in it's original English. "This shit is confusing. We should never watch a movie in Hebrew then buy it in English.", she said with a laugh. "Things tend to get lost in translation."
"I noticed that too. From now on, we'll watch and but it in English or Hebrew. Either or. No exceptions", he said with a chuckle.
They both sighed and started to drift off to sleep when there was a pounding in the door. "MOM! JONA'S WATER JUST BROKE!!"
Brie's eyes shot open and she jumped from the bed. After she put her pajamas back on, she rousted David. "Get dressed and go get Jake. I'm going to get Kaylian up and go check Jona."
David got out of bed sleepily and pulled on a pair of sweats. "She's in labor already?"
"Jeremiah just came to the door to let me know her water just broke. Let's see how far into the day you get your birthday baby." With that, Brie took off out the door and went to get Kaylian up and check Jona's progress.
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